So, today (02.03.15) was the nationwide release of the A level results for the graduating class of 2014. A pretty freak out-worthy day, as you can probably imagine, especially for someone in my position. I suppose I should explain my circumstances, so here goes...
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| (part of) 12S29. look at all those fresh faces! |
I sat for my graduated secondary school in 2011, with 11 points (raw), and entered SAJC with 7 points after deducting 2 points for my CCA and another 2 for affiliation. I chose the science stream thinking I could handle it. After all, I had handled my pure biology/pure chemistry subject combination pretty well. I had scored all B3s for my maths and sciences, and all A1s for my language and arts subjects, barring combined humanities, for which I attained an A2 grade. Thus, I entered JC, a bright eyed, bushy tailed 17-year-old. 2012 was a great year, and I met a ton of great friends, some of whom I couldn't live without now.
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| L-R: Merryl, Jen, Liling, Jun aka MY LESBO LOVES <3 |
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| L-R: Sebas, Akhi, Rauf, Chris |
Yes, all these lovely people were my classmates that year (12S29 HUAT AH!). And yes, we are the freaking poster children for racial harmony. Between us, there are 2 Chinese, 1 Vietnamese, 1 Chindian and 4 Indians. MULTIRACIAL SIOL. Indeed.
At the end of the academic year, when my grades left much to be desired, I was given the choice to repeat a year or pursue other options (a nice way of saying "drop out"). I chose to stay and ended up changing my combi from a hybrid science one to a full arts one, with H2 Lit, History and Econs and H1 Math. Repeating also meant that I would have to leave S29, naturally, and be separated from all these beautiful faces. "Thankfully", and I use this word VERY loosely, Jen and Liling also retained and chose to swap to arts combis. And so began our foray into the world of the arts... Long story short, we had a ton of fun, but school still reeeeeeeeeaaaaally sucked. We laughed and cried in equal measure, hugged and hated our teachers in equal measure and celebrated and cursed our decision to continue in JC in the arts in equal measure.
Eventually, the arduous journey came to an end, as we finished off our H2 SEA History paper on 24th November 2014. After that, we all resolved to never think about the A levels again until we absolutely had to, meaning results day Of course, the inevitable, being inevitable, arrived and we had to confront our fears.
I harboured secret hopes for a perfect or near perfect score. Anyone who know the JC grading system knows it's pretty stupid. It's like NAPFA, where each grade for each subject gives you points up to a maximum of 90 overall. No, not 100. 90. And they don't even make it nice numbers. Like intergers. Noooooo, we shall make it numbers like 6.25. LIKE WHAT. Ok, anyway...
Jen, Liling and I, having slept over at Jen's the night before, made our way to school together. We were told to be there at 2, and were prepared for the customary 30 to 45 minute prep talk on how "it's not the end, it's a new beginning" and stats. SAJC does this thing where they call out all the 90 rank pointers, followed by those with "exemplary character" or top tier leadership positions in their respective CCAs, the latter two groups for those with 80 rank points and above. I was on none of those lists. None. Nada. Zilch. Zero. The exemplary character one may have been a stretch, but as a member of the EXCO of Iota Publications, I was kinda crushed when my name wasn't on the well-rounded students list. Then anxiety started kicking up several notches as I worried about getting straight Cs and failing General Paper.
Some background info: I usually am on the honour roll for GP and Lit. A bit of a humble brag, but also fact. Another fact was that I started my A level mental meltdown of epic proportions as the GP A level paper started. That was also the only GP paper in 3 years that I DID NOT FINISH. Yeeeeaaahh, not a good way to start. Then, I felt like I bombed Lit paper 1, and sat in the toilet crying when it was over. So BOOM, my two best subjects down the drain. Then, for SEA History, I was prepared only for 2 questions. I had to do three. GOOD JOB ANDREA. THOSE MONTHS AND MONTHS OF 10-HOUR LONG STARBUCKS STUDY SESSIONS CLEARLY DID YOUR BRAIN NO GOOD AT ALL, despite you feeling "productive".
Back to results day, I took my results slip without looking, slipped out of the hall to the allotted stairwell where I waited to be joined by Liling, Jen, Rauf and Jun, among others. Sebas and Akhi were at camp (yay conscription) but sent well wishes via whatsapp, while Chris waited to call from Aussie. When we did get down to looking at our grades, the first thing I saw was this big glaring C for Econs. The one I was semi-confident about. Cue mental freak out. Then, I realised I had gotten an A for both H2 Lit and History, both miracles in their own right. HALLELUJAH, AMEN. My anti-math brain had gotten a B for H1 Math, praise the Lord, and an A for GP. Somehow, though, it didn't register properly and I was still stuck on the C and unable to count how many rank points I had. Again, anti-math brain here. Jen's bro did some quick mental math for me and -- 83.75. EIGHTY. THREE. POINT. SEVEN. FIVE. WHAT IN THE ACTUAL HECK. I genuinely couldn't believe it. With what had transpired 3 months ago, I believed I had submitted sub-standard work and could never have made the cut. But I did.
As a Christian, I was literally thanking God. Seriously. 3 years of JC is enough to drain anyone's soul dry and leave you a shell of your former self. So as I finally close this chapter of my life, I've been reflecting. On the things I've learnt, from teachers and peers alike, on my experiences, painful as they may have been, because they made me who I am today. I cried when I was alone, not just because I was happy, but because I could finally let go of the regret and shame I didn't know I still attached to that extra year. It really paid off, and I was finally able to prove to myself that I was capable of producing results like this. That no matter what had been said or would be said about my extra time in JC, that no one could take the fruits of my labour away from me. Of course, this was no solo effort. Without my faithful study buddies Jen and Liling, and the constant encouragement from all our friends, I believe I would have given up and wasted away long ago. My churchmates, who helped anchor me to my faith, which gave me faith also went a long way in helping me achieve this. I know that I've been blessed, not just as a fully functioning human being, but also through everyone around me.
This journey has strengthened me so much, I don't regret a minute of it. I wouldn't repeat it, EVER, but no regrets. I hope my sharing here helps anyone out there facing academic problems. It really isn't the end. The average life span of a Singaporean is ~84 years. What's an extra year or two? What's the hurry? It is after all always said that the years at school are the most enjoyable. It doesn't matter if random people think you're slow. Maybe you are. maybe you aren't. The important thing is to never give up. The prize doesn't mean much without the journey. Surround yourself with the people who will uplift you, but also correct you. The ones who believe in you. You might not believe in yourself; doubt is a powerful thing, but never let that stop you. The more you fear, the more you have to push yourself, so that you have nothing to fear. Ask for help, and you will find it. Battles are meant to be fought and won, but not alone. As in Liverpool, you'll never walk alone, and as in My Little Pony, friendship is magic. -insert sparkles-
I will never forget my A level journey, and to anyone who's just starting out on it, I wish you the best of luck. Seriously. You're gonna need it. (/*0*)/ HEY HO LET"S GO.
Signing off with sunshine, sparkles and sakura petals,
Andrea o(>A<)o
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| the girls at 2013 prom |
I harboured secret hopes for a perfect or near perfect score. Anyone who know the JC grading system knows it's pretty stupid. It's like NAPFA, where each grade for each subject gives you points up to a maximum of 90 overall. No, not 100. 90. And they don't even make it nice numbers. Like intergers. Noooooo, we shall make it numbers like 6.25. LIKE WHAT. Ok, anyway...
Jen, Liling and I, having slept over at Jen's the night before, made our way to school together. We were told to be there at 2, and were prepared for the customary 30 to 45 minute prep talk on how "it's not the end, it's a new beginning" and stats. SAJC does this thing where they call out all the 90 rank pointers, followed by those with "exemplary character" or top tier leadership positions in their respective CCAs, the latter two groups for those with 80 rank points and above. I was on none of those lists. None. Nada. Zilch. Zero. The exemplary character one may have been a stretch, but as a member of the EXCO of Iota Publications, I was kinda crushed when my name wasn't on the well-rounded students list. Then anxiety started kicking up several notches as I worried about getting straight Cs and failing General Paper.
Some background info: I usually am on the honour roll for GP and Lit. A bit of a humble brag, but also fact. Another fact was that I started my A level mental meltdown of epic proportions as the GP A level paper started. That was also the only GP paper in 3 years that I DID NOT FINISH. Yeeeeaaahh, not a good way to start. Then, I felt like I bombed Lit paper 1, and sat in the toilet crying when it was over. So BOOM, my two best subjects down the drain. Then, for SEA History, I was prepared only for 2 questions. I had to do three. GOOD JOB ANDREA. THOSE MONTHS AND MONTHS OF 10-HOUR LONG STARBUCKS STUDY SESSIONS CLEARLY DID YOUR BRAIN NO GOOD AT ALL, despite you feeling "productive".
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| I spent so much time and money at starbucks and cafe galilee, my insta was basically free advertising... |
Back to results day, I took my results slip without looking, slipped out of the hall to the allotted stairwell where I waited to be joined by Liling, Jen, Rauf and Jun, among others. Sebas and Akhi were at camp (yay conscription) but sent well wishes via whatsapp, while Chris waited to call from Aussie. When we did get down to looking at our grades, the first thing I saw was this big glaring C for Econs. The one I was semi-confident about. Cue mental freak out. Then, I realised I had gotten an A for both H2 Lit and History, both miracles in their own right. HALLELUJAH, AMEN. My anti-math brain had gotten a B for H1 Math, praise the Lord, and an A for GP. Somehow, though, it didn't register properly and I was still stuck on the C and unable to count how many rank points I had. Again, anti-math brain here. Jen's bro did some quick mental math for me and -- 83.75. EIGHTY. THREE. POINT. SEVEN. FIVE. WHAT IN THE ACTUAL HECK. I genuinely couldn't believe it. With what had transpired 3 months ago, I believed I had submitted sub-standard work and could never have made the cut. But I did.
 |
| the L.I.F.E. cellies <3 |
As a Christian, I was literally thanking God. Seriously. 3 years of JC is enough to drain anyone's soul dry and leave you a shell of your former self. So as I finally close this chapter of my life, I've been reflecting. On the things I've learnt, from teachers and peers alike, on my experiences, painful as they may have been, because they made me who I am today. I cried when I was alone, not just because I was happy, but because I could finally let go of the regret and shame I didn't know I still attached to that extra year. It really paid off, and I was finally able to prove to myself that I was capable of producing results like this. That no matter what had been said or would be said about my extra time in JC, that no one could take the fruits of my labour away from me. Of course, this was no solo effort. Without my faithful study buddies Jen and Liling, and the constant encouragement from all our friends, I believe I would have given up and wasted away long ago. My churchmates, who helped anchor me to my faith, which gave me faith also went a long way in helping me achieve this. I know that I've been blessed, not just as a fully functioning human being, but also through everyone around me.
 |
| one family unbroken -- SAJC batch of 2014 once a saint, always a saint |
This journey has strengthened me so much, I don't regret a minute of it. I wouldn't repeat it, EVER, but no regrets. I hope my sharing here helps anyone out there facing academic problems. It really isn't the end. The average life span of a Singaporean is ~84 years. What's an extra year or two? What's the hurry? It is after all always said that the years at school are the most enjoyable. It doesn't matter if random people think you're slow. Maybe you are. maybe you aren't. The important thing is to never give up. The prize doesn't mean much without the journey. Surround yourself with the people who will uplift you, but also correct you. The ones who believe in you. You might not believe in yourself; doubt is a powerful thing, but never let that stop you. The more you fear, the more you have to push yourself, so that you have nothing to fear. Ask for help, and you will find it. Battles are meant to be fought and won, but not alone. As in Liverpool, you'll never walk alone, and as in My Little Pony, friendship is magic. -insert sparkles-
I will never forget my A level journey, and to anyone who's just starting out on it, I wish you the best of luck. Seriously. You're gonna need it. (/*0*)/ HEY HO LET"S GO.
Signing off with sunshine, sparkles and sakura petals,
Andrea o(>A<)o
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